Pregnancy Fortunes

Item #: PREG-01 
You have a parasite attached to your body for 9 months. It makes you feel horrible, steals your nutrients, distends your belly, kicks you in the stomach, and will eventually tear through your sensitive parts. Congratulations! 
 
Item #: PREG-02 
Hello, baby! Goodbye, sleep! 
 
Item #: PREG-03 
All the books and articles in the world can't prepare you for the surprises that your child will bring. 
 
Item #: PREG-04 
Little hands, little feets, and a little trouble are all on the way. Congratulations!  
 
Item #: PREG-05 
When you are choosing a name for your baby, don't forget the names of the important people in your life… Like me!
 
Item #: PREG-06 
Why do you need a baby shower when your baby is already taking a bath? 
 
Item #: PREG-07 
I heard babies suck… Especially when they're hungry. 
 
Item #: PREG-08 
Congratulations on getting a 9 month parasite that will turn into an 18 year plus parasite! 
 
Item #: PREG-09 
I heard about your newest development. Congratulations on being so creative! 
 
Item #: PREG-10 
Sit down. I think it's time to have 'the talk'. Babies don't really come from storks.